; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
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Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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