the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize