Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
