im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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