Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
