and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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