she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
