If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
