WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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