Kareoke will never be a sober sport
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
he shaved USA in his pubs
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
