Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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