Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
