I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
