I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
