No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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