Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
