I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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