omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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