I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
i just made my gag reflex go away.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I just found puke in my bra..
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
