I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
