I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Randomize
