STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
