So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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