whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
