can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.