Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
