You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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