I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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