We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
