I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
