You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
