a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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