how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Randomize
