i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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