What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
