Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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