He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
