i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
