i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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