If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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