dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Randomize
