singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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