OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
