You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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