Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
