Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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