Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Holy sore nipples Batman
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
