yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
