i need an iv and a liver transplant
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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