He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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