ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize