so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
My life is pants optional.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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