My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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